You know you're too fat when........
People from Greenpeace keep throwing you into the water whenever you go to the beach.
You notice that you have your own gravity.
Your jogging suit comes with back-up lights and a little horn that beeps when you walk backwards.
The owners of the local all-you-can-eat buffet meet you at the door with a $20 bill and ask you to eat somewhere else.
You get a ticket for not having an orange "slow moving vehicle" triangle on your back when you go jogging.
Your wife exercises the dog by walking it around you.
The salesman for the big and tall store takes one look at you and says, "this is going to be a challenge!"
Your tailor has to break out surveying equipment to alter your suit.
Your waistline in inches is approaching your IQ.
Your waistline in centimeters is approaching Bill Gates' net worth in dollars.
People ask you to wear a white shirt to the party just in case they need to show home movies.
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